Imposter Syndrome: why authenticity matters more than applause.

Mr Laurie, 

How best to deal with imposter syndrome?

Peace out,

Kristen 

Dear Kristen,

I don't ever worry about imposter syndrome because I know I'm the best. Let me explain.

Firstly, what is success: good pots, great sales, maybe an award or two? Is it avoiding silicosis, RSI and tendinitis? Is it respite from lower back pain or an article about your seeming idyllic lifestyle in a bourgie magazine? For most potters success is a slow incremental grind. Success is getting started, turning up consistently and persevering when things are difficult. Real success is earned, it can’t be given or taken away and is much more than an outcome. You don’t get success, you acquire it, over time. Success is ephemeral and transient (and often boring). 

Success is so subjective that you may as well just assume you have it.  Try identifying as a winner. Imagine that your life is a fantastic movie. Imagine that you are the writer and director, and so can assign yourself an exciting hero's journey. Make it an adventure. Don’t write a tragedy, full of doubt and suffering. My own personal movie is like a low budget rom com with clay. I occasionally wish it was more exotic but it's authentic and that matters more. Authenticity is success. 

If trying and failing makes you an imposter then you are in excellent company. The best potters are the ones who aren't afraid to lose because losing is learning. If everything always works out you're not pushing hard enough. The greats aren't waiting for accolades or questioning their value and neither should you. Applause is just two hands smacking into each other repetitively. It’s objectively ridiculous. If you’ve done your best and got a result, give yourself a high five. You deserve it. If you’ve fucked something up it’s ok to lie down and have a little cry. But have a blub and then get back to work, starting with an objective review of what went wrong and how to avoid it happening again. A potter's life is full of little beatings but every victory is evidence of your expanding self worth and determination. 

And don’t listen to the critics. Your detractors don't care about you. I'm not talking about legitimate, useful criticisms here. I’m talking specifically about those miserable, whinging, shit bags trying to ruin your buzz. If imposters do exist, it's them. They’re broken little trolls pretending to be human. Never take advice from someone who wants to hurt you. Unless you are actually running an elaborate scam that inflicts suffering on others, relax. Drink the champagne. Do your victory dance. Fuck those itchy stoics in their horse hair undies. If you can’t enjoy the fruits of your labour, what's the point of labouring? 

Now this is where it gets weird. For most potters the voice of disdain actually comes from themselves. More often than not nobody actually cares if you're winning, losing or deserving. Nobody's trying to bust you as a fake. They’ve got their own shit to deal with. Unfortunately imposter syndrome is mostly your own perception. It’s likely that the only person waiting to catch you out as a dastardly fraud is… you. Don’t rain on your own parade. Change the narrative and allow yourself a little glory.

As I was saying earlier: I don't ever worry about imposter syndrome because I know I'm the best. I’m the best at being me. In my movie I’m the clay slayer, the ceramic mechanic, the potter with a lotta, the original mud stud. The Best Potter in the World. As long as I’m doing the best I can I’m winning. And so can you Kristen. Don't fart in your own lunch box.

XL